Getting Through It
It's been a long year.
Some crushing lows slapped you and smacked you around. There were times your heart dipped and you squinted back tears while your stomach squeezed so tightly you couldn't sleep. Loved ones hurt, friends didn't stay, someone dear to your heart drifted away.
But as you walked your hard path down your long, bumpy road some awareness and strength dripped into your bones. This year you grew in ways you don't even notice yet. As you struggled you empathized, as you slipped you understood, as you worked you earned, as you looked you learned, as you dared you grew, as you jumped you flew.
Yes your dreams are still focusing and your passion is growing. Your energy is still bubbling and your story keeps going.
So stop for a second to smile at everything you've done this year...everything you've seen...everywhere you've been...
AWESOME!
so for this coming new year, we'll be wiser and stronger. have a happy one!
26th Day of Christmas
my mom's in the philippines so she didn't spend christmas with us this year. it was pretty boring at home. my brother had work. my other brother and my dad spent christmas together since i was out and about--that was cute. as for gifts, i received a couple--a watch and a running jacket from my bf; a top, perfume, and chocolate cookies from guru camille; a scarf and a pair of gloves from my boss; and a couple more from other people. good stuff. there's still a few more friends that i have to buy gifts for.. better late than later.
i have been the laziest when it comes to reading other people's posts. forgive me. maybe in 2013 i'll be a better blog hopper. i hope. hehe.
14th Day of Christmas
1st Day of Christmas
Thanksgiving 2012
don't get me wrong. i have tons of stuff to do and things to take care of, but instead i'm procrastinating. it's nothing new and i do it all the time. who am i kidding--i'm being very lazy because i don't feel motivated. i feel unmoved. i feel like blah. i don't feel sad. i don't feel happy. i don't know how i'm feeling.
i'm on a week break from work for the thanksgiving holiday. i've been spending my time doing things that are not on my priority list--for instance watching t.v., sleeping in, wasting time, etc. pretty much avoiding the thing that i need to do the most while i have all this free time. today, i slept in, watched t.v., somewhat cleaned up my closet, and watched the movie "you've got mail" for the nth time. it never fails to cheer me up and make me feel good inside..temporarily.
now that i actually feel like i'm stepping into the world of adulthood, there's a feeling of uncertainty. i don't know if i'm fit for this lifestyle--if i can endure all the trials. i don't know if i can prove to myself and everyone else that i am worthy to become an official member of this society. i feel that i've accomplished the things that i wanted to accomplish, but at the same time, i don't feel like it's sufficient. i'm just tired of having to prove myself all the time. i must be going through something right now. i just don't know what.
Social Networking
What Summer Break?
Job Interview
had one today.. it's a part-time one. since school is out i have time to add a summer job to my other part-time job. i have to be honest, though. my heart isn't too into this one, but if i do get the job i will be more than grateful. i'll find out on thursday.
reminder to self: the job is a daily 3-hour teaching job in a small office setting.
Random #2
last april, i created a random post stating what i felt about the people around me. i read my post again and felt slightly ashamed of how bitter i sounded. i don't normally complain about things like that, so i'm thinking now that i probably had mood swings during the time i posted that. either that or someone did something that triggered my sudden burst of emotions. either way, i wasn't proud of it. normally, i'm a very understanding person and i try to put myself in other people's shoes, but some people can be mean-spirited and do things to hurt others and that's when my grip on humanity loosens up. maybe that's the reason why i very rarely watch the news.
anyway, i've been reading The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald (since i never got the chance to read it during my younger years) and i'm almost done--two chapters to go. that was going to be my summer read. i didn't realize it was a short book. now i need a new book to read. i went to the bookstore when i picked up Gatsby and i had a hard time picking through books. i really want a good one.
Random #1
anyway, the weather's been so unpredictable lately (earthquake weather, ika nga). baka nga totoo na ang pag-guho ng mundo this year. there's been earthquakes everywhere, but who's to say when the world will end? i guess we don't really know when our time will be up. as cliche as it may sound, people still say "live your life to the fullest", but as much as we'd like to live our lives to the fullest, it's just kind of impossible, i think. well i guess the meaning of "living life to the fullest" is subjective. i can be climbing the tallest mountains of the earth and living life to the fullest or i can be on my couch all day and still be living my life to the fullest. whatever works. the thing is i'm a very lazy person in terms of chores, so does that mean i shouldn't worry about folding my clothes anymore? because i don't perceive that as living my life to the fullest. just a thought. teehee.
Subbing
kay bilis talaga ng panahon. akalain mong malapit na palang mag April. anyway, this month i started working again in the education field. i work as a substitute teacher. so far super enjoy naman ako. madali lang kasi ang trabaho tapos gusto ko pa yung ginagawa ko. at syempre naman sobrang mas okay ang sweldo kesa sa video store, which i am still doing. para naman may weekend gig kahit papano. gas money din yun. kumbaga yung nakukuha ko dun, yun na yung allowance ko. the rest, for my bills and for my future needs. naks. talagang may ganon? ok din tong substitute teaching gig eh, i get to experience all grade levels from Kinder to 8th grade. high school di ko kakayanin. nung nag sub ako for an 8th grade class, after 3 hours with them, alam kong di ko kakayanin. mas makukulit pa kesa sa mga maliliit na bata.
anyway ulit, nabanggit ko dito sa blog ko before na may dalawang test ako na kelangan i-take at ipasa in order for me to get my permanent teaching license. so far i've taken the first one. next month ko pa malalaman ang resulta (namaaannn..major gudlak!) at yung pangalawa next month na din kelangan i-take. hayyy parang walang katapusan. pag napasa ko both i can apply for my teaching credentials, then hopefully get an actual teaching job (which is sobrang hirap sa bansang itoh at the moment! omg.). pagkatapos nun, i can have my own classroom. yes! well, sana pumasa muna.
yun lang muna ang update. babush!
FE
Me: No, what do you mean by FE? What's FE?
Student: It's iron!
Me: Ohhh... F E. Yes, you're right. It is iron.
Student: Yeah..from the table of elements!
Me: Wow...very smart!
taragis!
Ms. P
Patrick: Ms. P, i'm reading a third grade book and i'm on chapter 3. no one else has a third grade book.
Me: Good for you Patrick!
Corynn: Welcome to our school (then hugs me)
Me: Awww.. thank you sweetie.
Corynn: You're a nice teacher.
Me: Thank you. I try.
Me: Okay boys and girls. Today, we're going to write about carousels--what you felt when riding a carousel and what you saw around you when you rode a carousel.
Students' responses: food! monkey! zebras! bunny rabbits! people walking around!
Me: you guys see animals when riding a carousel?!
Students: yeah! at the zoo!
Me: I don't think they have carousels at the zoo.
Students: yeah they do.
Me: Oh okay, maybe they do.
Me: Okay so what did you feel when you were riding a carousel?
Students' responses: fun! happy! joyful! excited! peaceful! excellent! dizzy! vomiting!
Me: Wow, such big words boys and girls!
natutuwa ako pag mga bata ang tinuturuan ko. nagpa-power trip kasi ako eh. utos ako ng utos. gustong gusto kasi nila eh. nag-uunahan pang lumapit sakin. hahaha!
wala lang. i jotted this down to remember my first day subbing. fun stuff!
Husga
Eleven
- post 11 random things about yourself
- answer the tagged questions
- create 11 questions for the people you tag to answer
- pinaglihi ako sa pinya
- favorite ko ang v-cut chips saka piattos
- i'm a hands-on learner
- i wear contact lenses because i'm practically blind
- i was always yellow ranger when my cousins and i played power rangers. saber-toothed tiger!
- i don't mind having the subtitles on when watching movies
- it bugs me when people misspell my name, but i don't hate on them or anything
- i'm very bossy and like to boss people around
- i can be observant
- i like roadtrips and hotel rooms
- i want to be a boss someday, so i can literally say "like a boss".
- bakit yan ang napili mong url ng blog mo? di ko alam eh. thought it was unique :)
- kung papipiliin ka, maasim, matamis, o maanghang, bakit? matamis. kasi may tamis ako. haha!
- kung may pagkakataon kang tumira sa ibang planeta, anong planeta ito at bakit? hirap nito. wala ako maisip. siguro i'll stay here on earth na lang.
- ano ang pinakaayaw mong maging trabaho, bakit? taga-akyat ng punong niyog. baka mahulog ako eh.
- paano, saan, kanino, at kailan nangyari ang first kiss mo? nagmeet kami sa ilalim ng hagdan sa school..8th grade ako. 7th grade sya.
- ano ang una mong sasabihin sa ex mo kapag nakita mo sya? "uy! kamusta?"
- kung magiging type of cake ka ano ka and why? madali lang toh. chocolate. favorite eh.
- kung pwedeng piliin ang bilang at kasarian ng magiging anak mo ilan, at ilang babae o lalaki ang gusto mo? siguro isang babae at isang lalake lang.
- ano gusto mo, iwanan o mang-iwan? mang-iwan, mas masakit ang maiwanan eh. ako na insensitive.
- kung magkakaron ka ng pagkakataon na makausap ang presidente ng pinas ano ang sasabihin o itatanong mo sa kanya? "Noy, pwedeng pa picture at autograph?"
- and lastly, sino ang pinakainspirasyon mo sa buhay except sa pamilya mo, at bakit? i inspire myself. lol.
- sa tingin mo ba ay makasarili kang tao?
- kung naghihikahos ka na sa buhay, wala kang mga kaibigan, pamilya, asawa o anak, at grade 6 lang ang tinapos mo. ano sa tingin mo ang gagawin mo para magsurvive?
- kung artista ka, anong madalas na gagampanan mong roles?
- what are you most self-conscious about?
- kung papipiliin ka ng pagkain, at yun lang ang pagkain mo for one month, what would it be?
- ilan ang true friends mo?
- meron ka bang sikretong ni-isang tao ay hindi alam?
- burial or cremation?
- what's the most adventurous activity you've ever done?
- what's one personality/characteristic of a person do you dislike the most?
- do you have anything to say to me?
Valentine's Day
I'm Addicted
Anywho, I got into Grey's Anatomy because I was watching tv in the den and it was on..then I was hooked. Just like that. I haven't been here in awhile because of that show. I just started a few days ago and now I'm almost done with Season 2. I hope it doesn't get crappy in the later seasons.
I missed blogging and I missed talking to my friends here, but this is a short one.
So who's got a date on the 14th? ;D
Banyo Queen
pag-apak na pag-apak ko sa tub, nadulas ako. buti na lang di tumama ulo ko.
pero shieeeetttt, sa puwet talaga. sa left butt cheek. haha! bukas may pasa na 'toh.
natawa na lang ako eh. nakakahiya sa sarili..
ouwie.
At Work
family
- kasama ang mga maiingay at makukulit na mga bulilits na kumukuha na lang bigla ng candies at syempre ipapaalala ko sa mga parenthoods na bayaran yung candy na kinuha ng anak nila
- mag-asawang di makapag-desisyon kung action film ni jackie chan o ang labteam nila sarah at gerald ang rerentahin nila
- ang anak na gustong rentahin lahat ng anime
- "magkano?! $2.25?!"
- "bakit due agad bukas? di ba pwedeng sa makalawa na?"
- "hindi ko napanood kagabi eh. pakiextend naman ng one day."
me: sige po. $2.25 po ulit."ha?! ganun ba? sige wag na lang. - "ang tagal ng service. susme! wala naman tayo sa Pilipinas."
me: ay teka lang po. mag-isa lang po ako eh (at hindi lang po kayo ang customer dito). - "bakit wala pa yung pinareserve kong movie? kagabi pa yun, hanggang ngayon di nyo pa 'ko tinatawagan."
me: nako pasensya na po. mahaba po kasi ang listahan ng reservation eh (hindi ka nag-iisa sa listahan). - mahaba pa ang listahan na 'to. pinaikli ko lang.
- matanda
- lonely sa buhay
- amoy yosi
- matagal sa x-rated section ng store
- kung makatitig sakin.. eek!
- marami
- magulo
- sobrang tagal sa store
- nag-aaway away sa kung anung movie ang rerentahin. nakakatakot o komedy film? kasi bawat movie na ma-suggest ng isa eh panigurado at least isa sa kanila ay napanood na.
- sama-samang pumasok sa x-rated section at dun sila lalong nag-iingay sa lakas ng tawa.
- dala ang either real or fake bag na LV, Gucci, Coach, at kung anu anu pang mamahaling bag.
- may simple lang
- meron din maraming suot na bling bling
- refer to maangal section
- laging last minute mag-rent. di tuloy ako makapag closing ng maaga.
- naka scrubs uniform
- dala din ang name brands na bag (LV, Gucci, Coach, at kung anu anu pa). most likely hindi na fake.
- haggard look
- pinagmamalaki ang movie collection nya.
- wala daw ba kaming blu-ray movies for rent kasi ayaw nya daw quality ng dvd. fine. (dahil puro dvd players pa din gamit ng masa kaya dvds and pinaparent out namin).
- "miss anung bago movies?"
me: ah marami po (sabay sabi ng mga new movie titles).
"ah..tungkol saan ung movie na un? maganda ba un? anu un barilan? anu un drama? anu un komedi? anu un bold? (gahhhh!!!)
Ang Babae
Geek
Minsan
(makalipas ang ilang minuto)
ang hirap talaga kapag hindi sang-ayon ang paniniwala mo sa paniniwala ng iba. laging may hindi pagkakasunduan. maaring lagi rin may alitan. o kung wala namang gulo ay may iwasan na lang na magaganap. pwede rin na magkahiwalay-hiwalay na lang ng landas ang iba't ibang panig para wala nang halong drama. gulo man o iwasan, di pa rin maganda ang ending. magulo ba tong sinasabi ko o maingay?
gusto kong magbigay ng halimbawa sa sarili kong buhay kahit medyo alangan ako. alangan dahil personal na masyado. pero ayos lang para magampanan ng personal blog ko ang purpose nya sa buhay.
halos tatlong dekada na akong nabubuhay at sa loob ng maraming taon, marami na rin nabuong pagsasamahan, pagkakaibigan, at pagmamahalan (naks). punong-puno ng tawa, saya, alkohol, karaoke, chibugan, lihim, luha, murahan, at problema ang naging kwento ng barkada. umandar ang buhay habang sama sama at lumago ang samahan. tumibay ang kapit sa isa't isa. lumaki ang tiwala. nasa kasagsagan ang pagkakaibigan. masaya lahat kahit may problema kasi may karamay.
pero patuloy ang pag andar ng buhay. dumami ang responsibilidad ng bawat isa, pero tila kumonti ang oras sa isang araw, isang buwan, isang taon. nagbago ang ihip ng hangin. naging mas malamig. naging tahimik ang bawat gabi. paunti-unting humina ang tawanan, lumungkot, kumonti ang bote ng alkohol, nasira ang karaoke machine, naubusan ng pulutan, kumonti ang lihim na natutuklasan, nawala ang murahan, dumami ang problema--hanggang tatlo na lang kayong nagtititigan, dalawa na lang kayong kumakampay, at mag-isa ka na lang nagmumukmok sa kwarto mo.
habang tumatakbo ang oras, nagbabago ang paniniwala. nadadagdagan ang kaalaman. may ibang mabilis gumanda ang buhay, may ibang walang pagbabago, at may ibang pilit ibinabalik ang nakaraan hanggang yun na lang and nagiging mundo nila. di maiiwasan ang maging mahina habang ang iba'y palakas ng palakas. magbabago na ang pananaw tungkol sa isa't isa. mag-iiba ang opinyon tungkol sa iba't ibang bagay. di maiwasang magkumparahan ng estado sa buhay. magkaka-inggitan, magkaka-inisan. hiwalayan ang hantungan.
ang dating barkada mo na walang pwedeng tumibag sa tibay ng kapit, ay guguho din pala.
ang hirap talaga kapag hindi sang-ayon ang paniniwala mo sa paniniwala ng iba. laging may hindi pagkakasunduan. maaring lagi rin may alitan. o kung wala namang gulo ay may iwasan na lang na magaganap. pwede rin na magkahiwalay-hiwalay na lang ng landas ang iba't ibang panig para wala nang halong drama. gulo man o iwasan, di pa rin maganda ang ending. magulo ba tong sinasabi ko o maingay?
Friday the 13th
lam ko na kung anong malas. may tigyawat ako sa kilay. sa kilay! WTH?!
While On Break
so ngayon extended na naman ang bakasyon ko. may part-time job naman kahit papano. sarap ng buhay...weh?! hehe. tambay tambay lang muna. iwas gastos. mega tipid mode talaga ngayon. dami kong planong gawin at puntahan this 2012. eh kung wala akong trabaho pano ko naman magagawa yun. gudlak diba.
so dahil nakabakasyon nga ako ngayon. napagtuunan ko ng pansin si Budoy. oo ung show na Budoy. katuwa eh. pinagpupuyatan ko pa talaga kasi di ko naman alam ung show na 'yun til recently lang. nabanggit lang sakin nung kaibigan kong patay na patay kay Gerald. so ayun Budoy marathon hanggang kagabi nahabol ko na ung pinaka latest na episode.
aside from Budoy, i'm reading a book called Up the Down Stair Case by Bel Kaufman--about halfway done. yay! i've also been spending time with poy and that's always a good thing.
despite my current situation, there are still more good things than bad.
Whatta
fail! welp..of all the tests i could have failed, yun pang last two tests. bakit ganun? nakaka depress. nakakapanghina.
here's to another challenge i have to face. hayy.
i miss my students.
The Girl at the Video Store
kaloka. 11 hours akong nagtrabaho today. no complaints kahit ganun pa man--kesa naman walang trabaho diba. saka extra money din tong extra gig ko. the more gigs the better kaya rumaraket ako ng bonggang bongga. since nakagraduate na ko, hinihintay ko na lang ma-clear ung transcripts ko para makakuha pa ko ng mas maraming raket. excited na ko!
namimiss ko na ung mga ibang active bloggers dati..san na kaya sila? busy din siguro sa buhay buhay.
sana maging mas malawak pa ang pag-iisip ng mga tao..wala lang. random thought lang. dami pa din kasing makikitid ang utak.
Goals and Objectives
last year's goal was to be even more brilliant (walang kokontra), which i thought was a success. i met my 2011 objectives and on my way to meeting those objectives i learned quite a handful. i'm eager to learn more because "knowledge is power" sabi nga nila. unfortunately, i did have one goal that i did not get to meet--blog more often. becoming more brilliant took up majority of my time and energy, therefore blogging had to be put aside for a little while.
during the last four months of 2011, i was required to take three major tests associated with my future career. i passed one of them. the results of the other two will be revealed in four days. i am feeling very anxious, but excited at the same time. no matter the results, i just have to stay positive. my future plans depend on the results of those two tests and they will be life-changing plans. good luck!
i hope everyone had a good new year's day celebration.
here's to the auld lang syne!
2012 Happy New Year
- good health for me and my family
- to see Lady Gaga in concert
- a trip to the Philippines
- a boyfriend
- a new job
- to see Pacquiao and touch his guns (proud pinoy eh)
- my Bachelor's Degree
time to start my blog attack!





